Kelli Making It Work
My girl Kelli totally dominated last night on Project Runway. Her bleached and dyed vacuum cleaner bag– burt coffee filter dress has me feeling confident that she has what it takes to go far in this competition. I mean, the girl used the spiral from a notebook to create hook & eyes for the dress. Innovative? You better believe it plus she impressed the unimpressable, Nina.
I am totally giddy about this season based upon the first challenge. PR is going back to its roots!! Please be gone the days of having every friggin' challenge sponsored by some company. The grocery store challenge is all but my favorite in the entire series of the show. Also, fab? Bringing back Austin Scarlett to guest judge. He's so pretty.
But let's back up for a sec and meet some of the noteworthy contestants:
Blayne-Tanorexic little urchin. He looks like the nerdy guy from 30 Rock with a mega tan, Sun-In bleached moppy mane and the wardrobe cast offs from a 1980's Richard Simmons workout video. Calls everyone Girlicious and is desperately trying to make it this season's fierce. Not. Gonna. Happen.
Suede- Blue mohawk, refers to himself in the third person, HIS NAME IS SUEDE. Must I say more??
Stella – Rocker chick who only makes rocker duds out of leather and denim. When I look at her I can't help but hear the first few bars of this song in my head.
Jerrell- This season's bitchy queen. Most likely to be hated by everyone and tell the camera that he is not here to make friends. Overly confident and annoying. Oh - and he's from Houston. Sorry, I don't issue points based on geography.
We already know Kelli, and so far everyone else is just sort of blah in the personality department until proven otherwise.
Back to the challenge - When the designers were let loose in the store, I was shocked by how many of them ran for the table cloths, falling into the trap that shall now be known as Tableclothgate. I mean, these items violate the golden rule of Project Runway: Don't bore Nina. Some grabbed innovative and live objects and the following is the result of their efforts:
Runway Rundown: The Good
The Winner: Kelli's dress. While I am not a total fan of the top, I think that skirt is awesome and if the whole dress would have looked like it, I would wear it in a second.
Terri's outfit was pretty boss. I LOVE the braided mop head sweater top. With all that flair on top, she could get away with a simpler skirt. The outfit on the whole looked chic and expensive, another pleasing thing to Nina.
Wesley's dress was pretty cool too. He has some mad design skills (not yet a personality on the show, but skills – yes). He did kind of punk out and use a table cloth, but he manipulated fly swatters in that trim and it looks pretty fly. Sorry – had to.
Korto's dress was fab. She was acquitted of all charges on Tableclothgate because of her impeccable construction and the live trim she created with the kale, tomatoes and bell peppers. I would totally have worn that dress. I LOVED it.
Now for Daniel's Solo cup dress. Pretty damn innovative. The man IRONED plastic cups and made a dress. I am still kind of in shock that he didn't win but the judges gave him some love and you know with thinking like that, he will be there for at least a few more weeks.
Runway Recap: The Bad
Kenley's dress was not bad per se it just wasn't good. It wasn't memorable.
I'm sorry but don't you expect more from a guy named Suede than a table cloth dress? A tacky table cloth dress at that? You know who I think Suede reminds me of? Kayne from season 3. Remember his tacky ass?
Leanne's dress was just wrong. Not flattering, not innovative and once she realized that she hot glued Meringues to her dress to make it appear "as though she was dressed in candy." Um, did you even see last season, Leanne? The challenge where THEY HAD TO MAKE A DRESS OUT OF CANDY???? Jillian Lewis you are not.
Runway Recap: WFT???
Blayne made this. He should be thanking his lucky stars the next two outfits pushed him back to the Bronze Medal of Fugliness.
Winning the Silver Medal of Fugliness is ol' Cher and her plastic trash bags. She did make me laugh pretty hard when she said that if she went home first she would be the biggest jackass in the country. Lucky for her, that title went to the next contestant.
Jerry made this Patrick Bateman inspired outfit that he thought women would like to wear "out on the town". Seriously, this is what an OCD serial killer wears. And Tim told him to change it and his cocky ass didn't!!!! Congrats Jerry, you lose Project Runway but you have won the Gold Medal of Fug!!! Congrats.
And my favorite part of the ENTIRE show was the "this season on Project Runway" clips where Tim shouts to the designers "Holla at your boy!" OMG. Tim is such an OG. Love him.
Cute Couple
I am totally giddy about this season based upon the first challenge. PR is going back to its roots!! Please be gone the days of having every friggin' challenge sponsored by some company. The grocery store challenge is all but my favorite in the entire series of the show. Also, fab? Bringing back Austin Scarlett to guest judge. He's so pretty.
But let's back up for a sec and meet some of the noteworthy contestants:
Blayne-Tanorexic little urchin. He looks like the nerdy guy from 30 Rock with a mega tan, Sun-In bleached moppy mane and the wardrobe cast offs from a 1980's Richard Simmons workout video. Calls everyone Girlicious and is desperately trying to make it this season's fierce. Not. Gonna. Happen.
Suede- Blue mohawk, refers to himself in the third person, HIS NAME IS SUEDE. Must I say more??
Stella – Rocker chick who only makes rocker duds out of leather and denim. When I look at her I can't help but hear the first few bars of this song in my head.
Jerrell- This season's bitchy queen. Most likely to be hated by everyone and tell the camera that he is not here to make friends. Overly confident and annoying. Oh - and he's from Houston. Sorry, I don't issue points based on geography.
We already know Kelli, and so far everyone else is just sort of blah in the personality department until proven otherwise.
Back to the challenge - When the designers were let loose in the store, I was shocked by how many of them ran for the table cloths, falling into the trap that shall now be known as Tableclothgate. I mean, these items violate the golden rule of Project Runway: Don't bore Nina. Some grabbed innovative and live objects and the following is the result of their efforts:
Runway Rundown: The Good
The Winner: Kelli's dress. While I am not a total fan of the top, I think that skirt is awesome and if the whole dress would have looked like it, I would wear it in a second.
Terri's outfit was pretty boss. I LOVE the braided mop head sweater top. With all that flair on top, she could get away with a simpler skirt. The outfit on the whole looked chic and expensive, another pleasing thing to Nina.
Wesley's dress was pretty cool too. He has some mad design skills (not yet a personality on the show, but skills – yes). He did kind of punk out and use a table cloth, but he manipulated fly swatters in that trim and it looks pretty fly. Sorry – had to.
Korto's dress was fab. She was acquitted of all charges on Tableclothgate because of her impeccable construction and the live trim she created with the kale, tomatoes and bell peppers. I would totally have worn that dress. I LOVED it.
Now for Daniel's Solo cup dress. Pretty damn innovative. The man IRONED plastic cups and made a dress. I am still kind of in shock that he didn't win but the judges gave him some love and you know with thinking like that, he will be there for at least a few more weeks.
Runway Recap: The Bad
Kenley's dress was not bad per se it just wasn't good. It wasn't memorable.
I'm sorry but don't you expect more from a guy named Suede than a table cloth dress? A tacky table cloth dress at that? You know who I think Suede reminds me of? Kayne from season 3. Remember his tacky ass?
Leanne's dress was just wrong. Not flattering, not innovative and once she realized that she hot glued Meringues to her dress to make it appear "as though she was dressed in candy." Um, did you even see last season, Leanne? The challenge where THEY HAD TO MAKE A DRESS OUT OF CANDY???? Jillian Lewis you are not.
Runway Recap: WFT???
Blayne made this. He should be thanking his lucky stars the next two outfits pushed him back to the Bronze Medal of Fugliness.
Winning the Silver Medal of Fugliness is ol' Cher and her plastic trash bags. She did make me laugh pretty hard when she said that if she went home first she would be the biggest jackass in the country. Lucky for her, that title went to the next contestant.
Jerry made this Patrick Bateman inspired outfit that he thought women would like to wear "out on the town". Seriously, this is what an OCD serial killer wears. And Tim told him to change it and his cocky ass didn't!!!! Congrats Jerry, you lose Project Runway but you have won the Gold Medal of Fug!!! Congrats.
And my favorite part of the ENTIRE show was the "this season on Project Runway" clips where Tim shouts to the designers "Holla at your boy!" OMG. Tim is such an OG. Love him.
9 comments:
Don't forget "You look like a pterodactyl out of a gay Jurassic Park." I love it when T to the Gunn gets all bitchy!
My favorite part: "I don't issue points based on geography" Hear that, Houstonians? Step up and make P proud!
Excellent recap--haven't watched it yet; now I know just to skip to the "Holla at your boy!" And I need to check out Suede.
Leanne's model was working it, you know? Not bad in this photo.
Please don't start covering Flipping Out, for you would kick my ass.
i missed this and your recap is perfect - now i'm all caught up. of course i imagine bravo will play it 40 times before next week, but hey - still awesome.
SGM- have no fear. i would never trounce upon the fantasticness of your flipping out recaps. there is now way i could do justice to them like you do. your posts are art - that is why Ryan reads them!!! you hear that people?? the cast of flipping out reads SGM's recaps!!! priceless!!!
the cup dress was SO awesome. this season is going to be goooood!
Oh, you're recap is just hilarious. Glad we have different favorites, though. Now that they are up on our blogs, we can't turn back!!! Have a wonderful time tonight. I'll miss you guys.
I love your recap, spot on in my opinion.
The sentence "Seriously, this is what an OCD serial killer wears." made me laugh my ass off. Great recap!
i heart kenley! but your favorites were mine as well. that cup dress -- whew!
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